Monday, March 27, 2006

The Blogosphere as Teacher

I came close to not starting this blog. After starting it, I came close several times to shutting it down.

I've blogged heavily before. I used to have my own blog that I operated for close to two years, posting anywhere from once to five times daily. I was also paid a healthy sum to contribute anywhere up to 10x/day for another blog. I know what it's like to get into the "flow" of blogging.

I also know what it's like for blogging to become a dangerous obsession. My full time job - the one that supports my family of kajillion, the one that provides our no-copay, 100% health insurance coverage - suffered badly at the height of my fever. I occasionally blogged for a good cause, but mostly to exercise my ego and show others how brilliant I was. While I met many wonderful people while blogging, I also met a couple who triggered my insecurity, my need to be stroked and loved. My involvement with them nearly destroyed my marriage and my life. (And it didn't do them any favors, either).

And yet...here I am. Again. Why?

I almost shut down all blogging out of concern of falling into the entire cycle again. But beyond that, it seemed...I don't know, impudent to discuss my thoughts on spirituality at my current
developmental state. While my spiritual learning is decent, my spiritual experience still feels shallow and immature.

And yet...here I am. Again.

Why?

The reason is a bit of intuitive irrationality that has haunted me for years. I met a wise woman shortly after we moved out to the Seattle area. During a Tarot reading, she said that she saw a new wave of great spiritual teachers arriving into our midsts in the very near future. And she saw me as one of those teachers.

Now, for all I know, she was saying this to everybody who shelled out 15 bucks. (Say hello to my "inner skeptic".) Still, what she said struck a chord in me. I've sensed intuitively for many years that I have something to offer in the spiritual realm. Even after carving through and setting aside the myriad forms of spiritual materialism that can foster such a delusion, I still feel this drive to communicate what I know - however little that may be - to the world.

We can all teach according to our capacity, just as we all learn according to our capacity. I have great capacities for learning and communication. It would be silly to keep these to myself. There is no need for myself or anyone else, after all, to be the "perfect" teacher, to be "The One" a la Neo. This wise woman's insight isn't a license to delude myself with visions of delivering blazing sermons in the summer rain to 100,000 head-shaven bhikkus. If I write just one sentence that ends up turning just one person's life around, leading them to a deeper purpose and meaning to their existence, then all my efforts to walk the bodhisattva's path will be justified.

And I believe blogging is the perfect medium for teaching in this manner. Blogging can be ego-driven and single-minded, sure. But as shown by the blog roundups at Blogmandu, it can also create a rich dialectic of insight. The one dissolves into the many. One person's insights aren't as important as the network of insights. In other words, we can all be teachers - from the most enlightened among us down to the rankest spiritual amateur. This is the social dimension of spirituality taken to a new, exhilarating level.

Perhaps that's what Coolmel - er, C4 is feeling in his recent "rush" of blogging. Let's hope for all of our sakes that it is. (And let's hope he manages to do something about the pits. There's nothing worse than a sweaty Bodhisattva.)

Comments:
I sometimes think that what all these integral/buddhist blogs are doing is carving out a path by which these things can gain a more mass interest.

So if somebody gets interested in this world there are all these people talking about what the path felt like and what helped. And all the pitfalls and other such things.
 
"I also know what it's like for blogging to become a dangerous obsession."

thank you for articulating this. you really do understand what i'm going throug. i will take your wisdom to heart so i don't screw myself up, and those i love.

"We can all teach according to our capacity, just as we all learn according to our capacity. I have great capacities for learning and communication. It would be silly to keep these to myself. There is no need for myself or anyone else, after all, to be the "perfect" teacher, to be "The One" a la Neo."

you really do understand me man! thanks again. my intention is to teach what i can while learning what i can, in hyperspeed, until i burst out laughing.

"And I believe blogging is the perfect medium for teaching in this manner. Blogging can be ego-driven and single-minded, sure. But as shown by the blog roundups at Blogmandu, it can also create a rich dialectic of insight. The one dissolves into the many. One person's insights aren't as important as the network of insights. In other words, we can all be teachers - from the most enlightened among us down to the rankest spiritual amateur. This is the social dimension of spirituality taken to a new, exhilarating level."

perfect! i will quote this. you have a better flavor at articulation my friend.

"Perhaps that's what Coolmel - er, C4 is feeling in his recent "rush" of blogging. Let's hope for all of our sakes that it is. (And let's hope he manages to do something about the pits. There's nothing worse than a sweaty Bodhisattva.)"

i hope you're right. but like i said, i'm just flowing with serendipity, no end goal, no lofty plans (well, maybe), but you're right, i need to really do something about this sweaty piece of sh*t. so i will go to QFC and buy the strongest anti-perspirant i can get.

take care and stay lucid!
~C (for Can't stand the sweating)

P.S. speaking of blogging addiction, do you have a Zaadz blog? i have. ooops! sorry man, don't blame me.

P.P.S. i see you have a blogger named coolmel in your blogroll. who the f*ck is that?! i'm outta here! w00t!
 
Hi, I was surfing the internet and came across your blog. I'm quite impressed , with how it makes such good reading.

This is one to watch.

Many thanks,

Sell my time share
 
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